Are We Married?

I’m probably not telling you anything, but Texas is one big state. It took us three long days of driving to get through it.

We spent last night in Deming, New Mexico, after driving through El Paso alongside the blazing Mexican sunset. We passed through a Border Patrol checkpoint somewhere near Las Cruces, which was something of a shock. It stood, as imposing and impervious as the international border between Washington and Canada, but it was well into New Mexico–we never even entered Juarez. They waved us through, and we drove past their something-sniffing dogs. Were they hoping to catch people with those dogs, or what?

Catching up on some states we missed–there are a lot we didn’t document. Here are three.

Mississippi

• There is no form of relationship recognition for same-sex couples in Mississippi. In 2004, the good people of Mississippi voted to approve Amendment 1, 86% to 14%, adding amendment to their constitution stating, “Marriage may take place and may be valid under the laws of this state only between a man and a woman. A marriage in another state or foreign jurisdiction between persons of the same gender, regardless of when the marriage took place, may not be recognized in this state and is void and unenforceable under the laws of this state.” [via Wikipedia]
• If the spouse, adult children, and siblings of an individual cannot be contacted, “an adult who has exhibited special care and concern for the patient, who is familiar with the patient’s personal values, and who is reasonably available may act as surrogate” may make medical decisions on behalf of an incapacitated same-sex partner. An advance directive may also be written–it must be in writing and signed, contain the date, and be witnessed by two people or signed in the presence of a notary public.
• Any unmarried person may adopt in Mississippi, including LGBT people. Same-sex couples may not jointly adopt, however, and the law that prevents them from jointly adopting likely also prevents adoption by one partner of the other’s child.
• Mississippi law does allow amendments of birth certificates, generally, including changes of name and sex.
• Hate crimes law in the state does not protect individuals on the basis of gender identity or sexual orientation–but now there are federal hate crimes laws in place to help bring hate crimes perpetrators to justice.
• It is perfectly legal–or at least not prohibited–to discriminate on the basis of someone’s sexual orientation or gender identity in Mississippi.
• Safe schools laws do not protect students on the basis of their sexual orientation or gender identity. [via HRC unless otherwise specified]

Louisiana

• In the state where apparently not everyone got the memo about Loving v. Virginia, the 32-year-old Supreme Court verdict that allows interracial marriage in the U.S., constitutional amendment prohibits same-sex marriage. In 2004, by a 78% – 22% vote, this amendment was added to the Louisiana Constitution: “Marriage in the state of Louisiana shall consist only of the union of one man and one woman. No official or court of the state of Louisiana shall construe this constitution or any state law to require that marriage or the legal incidents thereof be conferred upon any member of a union other than the union of one man and one woman. A legal status identical or substantially similar to that of marriage for unmarried individuals shall not be valid or recognized.” [via Wikipedia] This appears to apply to marriages from other states, as well.
• Only by advance directive may a same-sex partner make medical decisions on behalf of an incapacitated partner. This directive must be signed, and witnessed by two people. [via LSU's Law Center]
• Any single person, including LGBT people, may adopt in Louisiana. There is no prohibition against joint adoption by same-sex partners, but this has not been tested in court. The same is true of the adoption by one partner of the other’s children.
• After gender reassignment surgery, a new birth certificate may be issued in the state of Louisiana.
• Louisiana hate crimes law protects people on the basis of their sexual orientation, but not gender identity.
• There is no law in Louisiana prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity.
• There are no safe schools laws in Louisiana to protect students on the basis of gender identity or sexual orientation. [via HRC unless otherwise specified]

Texas

• The Texas State Constitution was amended in 2005 to prohibit same-sex marriage. By a vote of 76% – 24%, Proposition 2 was passed: “Marriage in this state shall consist only of the union of one man and one woman. This state or a political subdivision of this state may not create or recognize any legal status identical or similar to marriage.” [via Wikipedia] As far as marriages from other jurisdictions are concerned, Texas law states: “In this section, ‘civil union’ means any relationship status other than marriage that is intended as an alternative to marriage or applies primarily to cohabitating persons; and grants to the parties of the relationship legal protections, benefits, or responsibilities granted to the spouses of a marriage. A marriage between persons of the same sex or a civil union is contrary to the public policy of this state and is void in this state. The state or an agency or political subdivision of the state may not give effect to a: public act, record, or judicial proceeding that creates, recognizes, or validates a marriage between persons of the same sex or a civil union in this state or in any other jurisdiction; or right or claim to any legal protection, benefit, or responsibility asserted as a result of a marriage between persons of the same sex or a civil union in this state or in any other jurisdiction.”
• Only by advance directive may a same-sex partner make health care decisions on behalf of an incapacitated partner. This directive must be signed and witnessed by two people.
• Single adults, including LGBT people, may adopt in Texas. There has been some case law granting joint adoptions by same-sex couples, but this is not explicitly allowed. There has also been at least one step-parent adoption by a same-sex partner.
• Texas hate crimes law protects people on the basis of “sexual preference,” but not gender identity.
• Neither sexual orientation or gender identity is a protected class in Texas non-discrimination law.
• Texas does not have safe school laws that protect students on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. [via HRC unless otherwise specified]

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We may not have mentioned this, but we’ve been doing this trip on a shoestring. Not to abuse the metaphor, but if you were using this string of ours to tie your shoe, you’d definitely think to yourself at this point, “Wow, I really need new shoelaces.” </metaphor>

You may notice that we’ve put a donate button on the sidebar to your right. If you choose to donate, you’ll be taken to a secure PayPal site. We wish we didn’t have to ask, but here we are–in Texas, far far from home. It was supposed to all work out–if barely–but things happen, sometimes all at once.

Every bit helps. For example:

• $50 will buy us a tank of gas.
• $30 buys us a night at an RV park.
• $20 buys us food for a day.

Or, to look at it another way, every dollar you donate will sponsor about 2 miles of travel. Every day we’ll post the names of the day’s sponsors. Sponsor us for five miles or a hundred–either way, we’re extremely grateful.

If our trip has given you hope, inspiration, or some other intangible benefit, and you want to donate, choose the gift or other amount you want to donate in the sidebar, click Donate, and you’ll be taken to the PayPal site.

If you are not able, or your donation dollars are spoken for, we still very much appreciate your participation in our journey, and hope that you will continue to join us.

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Welcome to Vermont!

I know it makes people in New England cringe, but there’s a dream popular among New Yorkers of moving to the country and buying a farm in Vermont. I think Vermont is chosen as a setting for that dream because it’s rural, beautiful, and the people have a reputation for being liberal. Even though I am from the Northeast originally, before this trip, Vermont was one of the six states I’d never been to. (I’m down to three: Wisconsin, Nebraska, and Alaska.)

I was sad the weather didn’t accommodate a longer visit to Vermont. I really wanted to get to Burlington. I just knew I’d love it. It wasn’t to be, however. As we mentioned in a previous post, the RV parks in northern Vermont had their water shut off during the time of our visit. It was also threatening to snow. So we headed south to Massachusetts–where it actually did snow.

But here’s what we missed as far as being queer in Vermont goes.

Vermont

• Vermonters of all sexual orientations can marry as of September 1, 2009! The legislature passed the new law, and even overrode a veto by the governor. The state also recognize same-sex marriages from other states. Prior to September 1, Vermont had civil unions that held all the same rights and responsibilities as marriage in Vermont. These will continue to be recognized, but no civil unions will be performed as of Sept. 1.
• Married gay and lesbian people in Vermont and those who have entered a civil union may make medical decisions for an incapacitated spouse or partner, and have visitation rights in the hospital. Those who have not married or civilly unioned (See how awkward that is?) may enact an advance directive authorizing a partner to make medical decisions. The advance directive must be dated and signed by the individual in the presence of two or more witnesses.
• Any adult in Vermont may adopt, including single LGBT people. Those with a civil union or married same-sex partners may adopt jointly, and married and unified (Is that better?) couples may adopt each other’s children.
• Vermont will issue a new birth certificate for transgender individuals with a decree of the probate court of the district where the individual was born. No idea how hard that is to get, or what warrants that decree.
• Vermont hate crimes law covers both sexual orientation and gender identity.
• Discrimination on the basis of both gender identity and sexual orientation are prohibited in Vermont.
• Vermont’s anti-harassment education law protects students from bullying on the basis of their sexual orientation and gender identity. [via GLSEN, otherwise via HRC]

Vermont gets 100% on my (admittedly not comprehensive) LGBT law survey–gold star! Maybe I will buy that farm after all.

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Boondocking. Also known as dry camping. That means you’re not hooked up to water and/or electric. You’re using your batteries to run your lights and you’re drinking the water stored in your tank. Some people, like the ones who frequent freecampgrounds.com, spend a great deal of their RV lives boondocking.

[Aside: Etymologically, boondocks is one of the few English words to derive from Tagalog: bundok, or mountain. (If you're curious, some others are yo-yo and cooties.) American soldiers occupying the Philippines misused it to mean a remote, wild place. If you were in one of those places, I guess you would have to boondock your RV.]

Not us. RV parks seem to these city kids to be remote and wild enough. We don’t have a television in the trailer, but if we did, we could hook up to the park’s cable. We certainly use the WiFi. And most parks have a store with necessities like RV-safe toilet paper and peanut butter. Not exactly roughin’ it.

Guadalupe County Safety Rest Stop

Last night was our first adventure in boondocking. Remote? No, unless you call a major interstate remote. Wild? I would have to say exceedingly cultivated, actually. Texas, it seems, has some very well-developed rest stops. Ours, located just outside of the San Antonio city limits, had a beautiful, air-conditioned building with faux rock benches and a giant-screen TV playing videos detailing the area’s attractions. It had amazing landscaping with desert and forest vegetation–freshly fertilized, I believe, if I can trust my nose. There was a playground and interpretive trails. And supposedly it had free WiFi, but we couldn’t get it to work.

Once the trailer doors were closed, it was hard to tell we were at a rest stop rather than an RV park. Our computers did run out of batteries eventually, but since the WiFi wasn’t working (which is also a common occurrence in RV parks), that was not a huge issue. I woke up a few times because really massive trucks drove by us, but I’m a light sleeper. Ami and Frances didn’t notice. And since we didn’t hook up anything, getting started in the morning was a cinch. In fact, I think we got on the road before 8 a.m.–a personal best. No trouble finding the interstate.

We can’t do it all the time, since our RV batteries only charge when hooked up to electricity, but I think we’ll save some of our RV park dollars by boondocking occasionally as we head back home. Apparently most K-Marts and Wal-Marts also allow you to park your RV for the night in their lots, but compared to the luxuries of the Guadalupe County Westbound Safety Rest Stop, those are some stripped-down digs.

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